since I’ve had any sex.  I think.  That’s a rough estimate, but I’m pretty sure the last time was in April since ex-boyfriend and I quit having sex about a month before the break-up.  I’m starting to fear that I’ll forget how to do it or I’ll be so nervous that I’ll be horrible and whoever it’s with will be like, “Uh, are you a virgin or something?”  Sure, a virgin with a twelve year old son.  I guess I could watch Showtime late at night for instructional and/or educational purposes.

Anjelica suggested I look at match.com for an age-appropriate man.  Yeah, I told her the whole horror story from a couple of weeks ago.  And yeah, she too mentioned that she knew I had a crush on D.  Fuck!  Can I not hide a single emotion?  Must I be such an open book?  Anyway, I decided to take a glimpse of available dudes between the ages of 35 and 45 within 25 miles of my zip code.  TruCowboy69?  Ick!  What a gaggy thing to call yourself.  Unless he was born in ’69.  At any rate, using 69 in your fake name is probably not the best way to attract a non-grody woman.  Not that I have anything against 69ing.  I just don’t think it’s necessary to name yourself thusly.  There was another one named 6FootNoBackHair.  That made me laugh.  There were a few that were cute, but for the most part, I think it was a bunch of 55 year old men trying to pass.  Not that any of this matters – I really cannot go on a date until after my dental work is finished.  Can you imagine this … “Excuse me, I have to take out my partial because I find it impossible to eat with it in.  Never mind my hillbilly look, k?  Thanks.”  Yup, I don’t think I’ll be going on a date for at least three more months.  That’s okay.  I’m supposed to be on a dating moratorium until after Valentine’s Day anyway.

Speaking of my stupid teeth, I get the other implant placed next Tuesday.  That gives me about two more months before they can finish the first implant and do the crown, yay.  Then the new one will be ready about mid-December.  So I should be all done by Christmas.  I cannot begin to stress how happy I will be on the day this is finished!

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